An Incomplete Guide to Science IAs

IA: acronym. Stands for Internal Assignment. Is a feature of the International Baccalaureate Diploma Programme where students research and write a mini-paper.

Dude, science IAs are not what the IB says they are. They can be confusing and tiring, and require way more time than the IB's prescribed "10 hours". No. I scrapped two chemistry IAs, a physics one, and had to rework some last-minute ethical concerns into my biology one. It is not a cakewalk. That stuff is 20% of your grade, but it's as stressful as 50%.

If you have actual lab experience, man, I'm happy for you, but for those of us who just kind of vaguely know how to use a pipette, a science IA is HARD. If you don't know how to work in a lab, the challenge of designing and conducting a laboratory experiment and then writing a report is terrifying.

Now, I take three science subjects. It's unusual in IB, but I did it. And so I had to do, naturally, three science IAs.
Yaaaay.
I got pretty lucky, actually. I'm not a particularly patient person, so I knew I wasn't going to be picking an IA topic I didn't care or wasn't even mildly curious about. I also knew that I was restricted by three things: my own experience/knowledge, my school's labs, and ethical considerations by IB guidelines.

Look, you're going to have to do an IA. It's an IB thing. And if you're going to be doing a science one, or two, or three, here are some things my friends and I figured out, and you need to know.


1. There are three major stages of doing an IA.

If you break down the process, there are three stages: finding and researching a topic, doing the experiment, and writing up the report.
These stages can sometimes blur together, or one can make a faint appearance in the middle of another one, but this is broadly the way it goes.
My science teachers made each of us write an actual proposal before we started lab work. We had to show a bit of background and a solid method to be approved. Then we could begin experimenting. We majorly griped about it but it's honestly really helpful, because you figure out how viable your idea is so you don't blunder through your labwork too aimlessly, and you know what your physical restrictions are (in terms of lab equipment available).
My point in elaborating this is: finding and researching a topic has to go together, or your idea won't get into the lab and onto the page. Once you know what you're doing, you can go about doing it. Then writing about it.

The Doctor doesn't know what he's doing. Don't be like that.

2. When choosing a topic, take into account restrictions.
Like I mentioned earlier, I was restricted in my IA choices by my experience and knowledge, the labs in my school, and IB ethical concerns. Working those considerations into my search for topics IMMEDIATELY narrowed my options, but in doing so, let me discard ones - however interesting - that I knew would not work out. With chemistry, for instance, I knew I couldn't use chloroform as a solvent. With biology, I knew I'm bad with plants, and that I didn't want to source expensive enzymes. With physics, which is my only science SL, I knew I didn't have the experience or material to build a complex circuit. Naturally, topics involving the things I couldn't do were ruled out before I could invest unnecessary time in them.

3. Starting early allows you time if you make mistakes or need to redo something.
Self explanatory, really. And yet we all love to procrastinate. Pro tip: don't. I started my second chem IA (the first died in draft stage) at the beginning of IB2. Which gave me time to do my third - and thankfully final - one when the second one failed.

4. Ask your teachers for help.
If you don't know something, ASK YOUR TEACHERS. "Ma'am, I found this method, but we don't have the material. I was thinking I could modify it like this...would that work?" Most of the time, they. Will. Help. You have to prove you're actually working on it and you just need confirmation or a little guidance. In my class, the kids who showed their progress, asked questions, and had an answer to "How is your IA going?" were the ones who got help. They were proving their sincerity and determination. The kids who evaded? Got way less help. Stay on your teacher's good side, get some help to boost your IA, and go do your labwork.

5. Don't be too meh or too creative.
So IAs are supposed to be unique, or something. News flash: you guys are like 15-18, you don't need to create an invention. My teacher, introducing IAs to us, said something along the lines of "It doesn't have to be completely new. You can take an existing experiment, and give your own unique addition or twist."
"Like what?" I asked.
"You can investigate a different variable...add something new."
"Like glitter?" I suggested.
Apparently not glitter. I'd suggest using something in the textbook that isn't explained in much detail as a starting point. That makes it a little more unique, but also not too much of a wildcard.

6. Graphs are good, but they need to make sense.
If you can show your data as a graph, great! (Without being redundant, that is. Don't unnecessarily repeat stuff. Talk to your teachers to figure out what qualifies as unnecessary.) But make sure the graph makes sense. I'm talking trendlines, axes labels with units, keys, error bars. Explain your graph in the text if you want. It needs to make sense, or else you're just filling up space.

The accuracy of this chart is undeniable, but its relevance? Kind of contentious. Don't do it.

7. Explanations are important.
So, on the subject of things making sense, I was asked in my IAs to clarify things that I thought were obvious. To stay on the safe side, write out your procedure so that it is crystal clear. Don't say "20 ml of the solution is measured" say "20 ml of <whatever solution> is measured using a measuring cylinder". When in doubt, give an explanation. It doesn't have to be long, but it's good to give a little context to your data, or mention your apparatus, or explicitly state the implications of your results. If the examiner's expectations change or something, your teachers can always tell you to remove your clarification.


With that being said, IAs are really about research, work, and luck. Know what you're getting into, in terms of what the IB wants and how you plan to execute your work. Keep your teachers in the loop. You don't have to give them hour-by-hour updates, but regularly checking in with them can help you: a) catch mistakes - whether procedural, calculation, or formatting - before they get too bad
b) stay on your teacher's good side, which makes them happier to help you, and
c) improve your IA as best as you can so you get a decent grade.

I hope this helps you with your IAs, and good luck!

How To Buy Time In Lit Class

If my literature teacher finds this post, I'm in so much trouble.

Seriously, have you ever heard of this?

I take English A Literature HL. What that means is I have to read quite a few essays, poems, novels, and plays. A bunch of these, I have literally never heard of (before I got my list of works, I had absolutely no idea who JM Coetzee or Saul Bellow were). Others are just hard to find. I mean, it's really easy to get yourself a copy of Jhumpa Lahiri's The Namesake, especially living in India, and ditto to Shakespeare's Hamlet, but where the heck do you get Bertolt Brecht's Mother Courage and her Children without trawling through Flipkart? It's a German play set during a European war like four centuries ago, what are the chances of it being in your local JustBooks?


Also, some of these are...dull. (I don't want to put you off, but you are incredibly likely to be forced to read at least one very boring text you struggle to finish during IB, whether you take Literature or Language and Literature)

Basically, sometimes class discussion and analysis of a text starts before you actually read it, whether that's because you haven't gotten a copy or it's slow to the point of being soporific or you have more pressing assignments. I get it. I do. You're going to have to eventually read it (I can say with the authority of experience that reading the book tends to majorly improve your scores) but here are some ways you can buy time to do so.


SECRET #1: Google Zindabad

You're gonna have to do the research. Google the text. Stuff like Wikipedia and Sparknotes will get you through several classes while you read the book. Get a basic understanding of the plot - even if sometimes you feel as if there is none - and some of the main characters.

Don't go into class with the vague knowledge that The Namesake is about a dude named after a Russian author. Go in knowing that it's set in the Indian diaspora in New England, spanning several decades and following the story of Gogol Ganguli, a whiny ABCD kid traumatised by the fact that his parents named him after depressed Russian author Nikolai Gogol. (Can you tell I'm not a fan of the book?)

SECRET #2: Pay Attention in Class

What, you thought I'd give you an easy way to sleep in class? Pay attention, kid, and you'll pull through IB.
This one's fairly self-explanatory. Pay attention. You'll learn stuff. It'll help you understand what on earth is going on when you do read the text.

SECRET #3: Sound Intelligent

I mean, I'm sure you're smart. But when I say "sound intelligent", I'm talking about asking smart questions in class. Stuff like "Could you give an example of the use of irony?" or "Does <character name> exemplify <philosophy that the author subscribed to>?" instead of "Who is this random character who came in during chapter 5?"

SECRET #4: Know Literary Terminology

You don't really need to know obscure literary terms like "lipogram" (which, by the way, is kind of random), but make sure you understand the difference between metaphors and similes, and know stuff like irony, personification, allusions, euphemisms, and hyperbole. This helps you with #3, sounding intelligent.

And finally, once you've bought your time, there's one more thing to do: read the text. To do this, keep one thing in mind-

SECRET #5: Persevere

Okay, so you finally access a copy of the work, and you don't have any immediate assignments, and you start to read...
...and it's boring.
Not every literature text is interesting. And with all the work you have, you might want to just relax and coast off your Sparknotes.
Don't. Give. Up.
My classmates were surprised when I read one of our texts in about an hour because, although it was barely over a hundred pages, there was so little plot that they had struggled for a few weeks.
Do you really want to spend weeks on a text when you can read it in a few hours? I didn't much like that text either, but I had no intention of prolonging that boredom. I refused to get up until I finished, and I read the book faster than anyone else.

My point? Persevere. Push through unwillingness or boredom when you read a text. You'll save yourself time, and you'll get it done with. It's a weight off your shoulders.


Good luck!

To My Fellow Fans

For the past few years, I've been posting on the 31st of July, writing open letters to Harry Potter and his creator, and an excited rant about how much I was looking forward to Cursed Child.

This year is kinda more special. I mean, sure, last year we had a NEW CANON BOOK (that half the fandom subsequently rejected but still) starting from the last scene of Deathly Hallows, but this year marks twenty years since the publication of Philosopher's Stone.

To be honest, I was kind of stumped about what to write. I mean, I did use up a lot of good material in three years. Then I found this collection of emotional tributes that genuinely gave me goosebumps, and it nearly sent me down a rabbit hole (oops, wrong fictional universe) of Harry Potter content calculated to make me tear up.

Which got me thinking not about the wizarding world and its inhabitants, but the people of our world who are so invested in it. My fellow fans, in other words. And this letter is to them.


Dear fellow Potterheads,

It's the 31st of July! Harry's birthday, JK Rowling's birthday, pretty much OUR day. It's been twenty years since Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone came out, twenty years since the fandom was born, twenty years since the doors of the wizarding world were thrown open to our world, twenty years since someone opened a book on a shelf to read of how proud Mr and Mrs Dursley of Number Four, Privet Drive were to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much.

Can I just say what a massive community we are? There must be Potterheads on every continent- except maybe Antarctica, unless a scientist studying weather patterns and penguins there turns out to be one.

I have seen strange and wonderful things in my years as a member of this fandom. I've seen fanart, Tumblr posts, fanfiction, homemade merch, cosplay, edits, GIFsets, quizzes and more. I've dedicated an entire folder on my computer to fanfiction I write, most of which is set in the Potterverse. As I type this, I'm wearing a T-shirt I painted with "DRACO DORMIENS NUNQUAM TITILLANDUS", and the initials of some of my favourite characters (I had so much trouble choosing them!) are written on my fingernails.

I've encountered fanfiction from the enthusiatically but confusedly written to the beautifully crafted. I've read POVs and AUs and things in between. I've seen casual sketches and intricately coloured paintings. I've come across ships I never would've thought of - ranging from the somehow perfect to the slightly weird to the downright strange - and theories that answered questions I never realised I had. I've become emotional at heartbreaking headcanons, I've laughed at hilarious posts and compilations of overlooked Potter-sass, I've scrolled through DIYs for a Tonks cosplay, I've watched amazing fan videos, listened to medleys of the movie score, taken all kinds of how-well-do-you-know or which-character-are-you quizzes, whistled Hedwig's theme anywhere and everywhere and had people turn around to smile or join in. I've quoted characters in class, in random conversations, even in speeches - just today I ended an official speech with the words "mischief managed".

This is a fandom that has consistently captured my attention. I may go through phases of other series or TV shows, but the Potterverse and this fandom has been there the longest for me. When I'm stressed or tired or having a bad day, it's often a single Harry Potter post or image or video, sent by a friend or popping up on my YouTube suggestions, that can cheer me up.

It's you who cheer me up.

We may have ship wars, disagree on choices of AUs, fight over characters' motivation and portrayal, argue over whether Snape was a "good guy" or not, have passive-aggressive exchanges online about random aspects of this incredibly detailed universe. But there's a reason we're a community.

We're people who were drawn to the adventures of a young wizard named Harry James Potter and his incredible friends (who deserve appreciation posts of their own) as they fought for equality and goodness against a heartless villain.
We're people who were charmed by the detail and intricacy of this world.
We're people who almost unanimously hate Dolores Jane Umbridge.
We're people who still sometimes feel annoyed by CALMLY.
We're people who understand each other's immersion in the Potterverse, who know there are others who feel as strongly, to whom it means as much or more.
We're people who love the Wizarding World. People who question it, marvel at it, but ultimately, feel like we're a part of it.
We're people who believe in magic. Maybe not the kind that allows someone to regrow bones overnight, make a broomstick fly, or teleport groups of people. We believe in the magic of a story, in the power of words to evoke emotions. Words are, after all, the most inexhaustible source of magic at Hogwarts.

So thank you, my fellow Potterheads. Thank you for sharing this universe with me, for opening up unprecedented parts of it for me to explore with you. This has been a fantastic five years for me, a fantastic twenty years for the fandom, and I look forward to many more.

Happy Potterverse Day!
-Purple Dragonfly

A Guide to MUN Jargon

A teacher walks into your class and announces that there's a Model United Nations conference being held somewhere or other and is anyone interested. You've heard about these MUNs. People dressing up fancy and going and debating about international issues. You raise your hand. It'll be your first MUN and you're excited.
You walk in to the venue and you're surrounded by other delegates. A lot of them are far more experienced than you and are talking, quickly and loudly, about all sorts of things. They mention UnMods, RoP, reso, blocs- it's as if they're speaking a foreign language. You didn't know that there would be a whole new dialect of English you have to know.

This situation sound familiar? To put it mildly, it's not fun. Luckily, I, with my *cough* staggering *cough* wealth of experience in MUNs, bring to you a crash course on the basics of this strange language.

(Before you go for any MUNs, though, I recommend you go to some introductory sessions where they explain everything and you can ask questions.)

Agenda: the issue you'll be discussing in committee

Allocation: this is what committee and country or body you have been assigned; for example, you could be Mozambique in the UN General Assembly, or the UNHCR (the Office for the UN High Commissioner for Refugees) in the UN Human Rights Committee

Bloc: this is a group of delegates who have decided they have similar goals and want to work together to produce a resolution; they are bros...for the time being

Chair: the group of people sitting at a table in the front of the room, directing the debate, and trying not to cringe when a delegate makes the same procedural mistake multiple times

Chits: notes; you're allowed to send notes to other delegates in committee or the Chair; you can discuss possible alliances, ask about procedure, say something you didn't get a chance to say in formal session (if you have good points, these can boost your chances of getting an award if you send it to a delegate via the Chair or directly to the Chair), complain about boredom, or flirt; however, if you plan to do one of those last two things, keep in mind that someone will read your chits and derive great enjoyment from them

Crisis: the bane or saviour of committee, depending on when it comes (dull time in committee? nearly close to resolution?), a crisis is exactly what it sounds like, a sudden high-stakes emergency the committee must immediately address; there is an entire panel of people who make up crises and I kid you not they are out to make your next couple of hours as stressful as they possibly can, and if you are a P5 country or some nation important to the agenda you my friend are going to be their running targets and let me tell you, in this metaphor they are snipers

GSL: an acronym for General Speakers List, this is your chance to give a 90-second speech about your (country's) foreign policy and stance on the agenda and show the Chair you're participating; if you make sure to put yourself on this list, you are far less likely to be called upon without warning to say something when you're unprepared to do so because you're not active enough (the Chair will do this to you); there is also something called the SSL or Special Speaker's List, which is basically a GSL during a crisis

Motion: almost anything you want to do in committee must be raised as a motion; motion to start a debate, to open the GSL, to move into a caucus and so on; the most fun one is the Motion for Entertainment, where you can have confessions, dares, and crazy things to appeal to the senses of immature and hormonal delegates

Pre-ambs: short for "preambulatory clause", the kind of words you use in the beginning of a resolution to outline the problem you're trying to solve and how much you hate the existence of the problem; one of those fancy abbreviations experienced delegates use

Reso: this is a shortened form of "resolution", the big document of solutions for your committee's agenda that some delegate puts forward and everyone votes on; this term can be used by anyone, but I first came across it when some fancy kind-of-arrogant delegate with a bunch of awards casually threw it out while talking to me, probably hoping that I'd get intimidated (I didn't and yes, it is possible I'm being paranoid about that guy trying to intimidate me, but it's normal to find delegates showing off, for example me)

RoP: this stands for "rules of procedure" and is basically the list of rules for how MUNs work and how everyone behaves (hint: formally)

UnMod: short for "unmoderated caucus", this is considered informal debate; basically you can get up and walk around and talk to people and write drafts of working papers or resolutions to be presented in formal committee session; more importantly this is an opportunity to suspend formality and use slang and words like "legit" (which is, for some reason, frowned upon in formal session)


And there you have it! A non-exhaustive but hopefully useful guide to MUN jargon. To those of you about to go for your first MUN, I hope this helps you and that you have fun! And to those of you who have been to MUNs before, let me know in the comments if I missed any important terminology calculated to mess with the mind of a nervous delegate.

IB Without Hashtags

"Sooo much work 😢😢 #IBLyf"
The number of variants on this that I've heard from my classmates deserves a sarcastic #noreally because I've heard/seen it on Snapchat screenshots far too much. (Snapchat...captions? What do the social-media-savvy people call the text they carefully put over photos?)

And even though my FB news feed largely consists of fandom posts, photos of acquaintances who have social lives, and feminist articles, every once in a while there'll be an IB meme like:

This one is probably true, tbh

Welcome to the community of IB students. So far what I've seen of it is dire warnings and complaints about the amount of work we have. Literally the only positive things I've seen about it is on ibsurvival.com - which is proving to be helpful in figuring out the many odd things IB requires you to do - by people who've graduated IB already (yes, such people exist) saying "It'll help you in college, just get through this!"


I'm...hopefully going to do neither. Since I'm not an IB graduate but a current student, I will not be the encouraging "I got through it so can you" kind of person, but nor will I be the "IB IS DEATH" kind of person (in my personal experience, the people - at least in my class - who complain the most tend to do the least work).

I'm starting now, at the end of IB-1, and if you're graduating with me, good luck, folks. If you're not, sit back with some popcorn. It's going to be a rollercoaster ride.

...and even if it's not a rollercoaster, it's not like you need an excuse to eat popcorn.

AQB: The Red Tent

One kind of story I really enjoy is when an author takes a classic tale- a fairy tale, folk tale, mythological epic- and puts their own spin on it or writes it from a new point of view. In fact, two of my favourite books are this kind- Susan Fletcher's Shadow Spinner, a new spin on the classic story of the One Thousand and One Nights, and Gail Carson Levine's Ella Enchanted, a retelling of the Cinderella story.

Anita Diamant's The Red Tent kind of fits into this category: it is based on a section of the Bible. Now, I know very little about the narratives of the Bible (so I'm not sure how the plot of the book matches with the Biblical narratives), but I did some research - because I believe in understanding at least some of the context - and here's what I understand from my Googling.
The Book of Genesis narrates the story of several generations. The last two of these individuals (representing their generations) are Jacob, also called Israel, and his son Joseph. Jacob is said to have had twelve sons - of which Joseph was the eleventh and fated to be the supreme - and one daughter, Dinah. Dinah is a minor character in Genesis - there is one story about her called "the rape of Dinah", a violent episode which ends in her brothers committing a massacre/genocide - but The Red Tent is her story.

The red tent is a sacred spot to the women of Jacob's family - it is where they must spend their periods and when they are in labour, a place where they give each other support. It's symbolic of the bond between women, and of the stories kept alive by the womenfolk. The Red Tent is the story of a woman in a man's world, an account of the sweeping stories of Jacob and Joseph but also of the small stories of forgotten characters.
 "...It is terrible how much has been forgotten, which is why, I suppose, remembering seems a holy thing..." says Dinah.

I decided to read The Red Tent for multiple reasons- it was on the Rory Gilmore Reading Challenge, I had a copy at home, it was a suggestion when Emma Watson's feminist reading club (Our Shared Shelf) on Goodreads was voting for a book of the month, AND my mom recommended it (I trust my mom's recommendations).
I'm really, really glad these factors came together and I read it because it is one of THE best books I've ever read. And that's even though I didn't know anything about the Book of Genesis until my research. Seriously. It's fantastic.

P.S: If you read The Red Tent (and I hope you do, because it is REALLY good), I'd recommend knowing at least a little about the stories of Jacob and Joseph, just to provide context.

Of A Cursed Child

Disclaimer: This post contains no spoilers. This is largely due to the fact that I haven't finished the book yet, but also because #keepthesecret, guys, it's only been a few hours.

Before I begin, allow me to say something in a language popularized by the vast community of excited fans of anything:
ASDFGHJKL;ICANTEVENWSDJKAJFAHLJ

Unless you have been living under a rock, with no internet connection, by now you would have heard about Harry Potter and The Cursed Child, the much-publicized script of the (again) much-publicized play of the same name set immediately after "Nineteen Years Later", and dubbed the "eighth Harry Potter book.

Let me repeat that. THE EIGHTH HARRY POTTER BOOK.
*sigh of pleasure*
Since I was too young to have actually followed the entire series as it came out, I cannot paraphrase Sirius and scream- I DID MY WAITING! NINE YEARS OF IT!
But certainly, as a Harry Potter fan, I can hold the book and (changing fictional worlds here) whisper myyyy preeeecioussss.
(My classmates would trip over themselves running away from me, despite the allure of the "precious". I do a creepy Gollum impression. Thanks, Andy Serkis, for teaching me too well.)

Some people have said that this is a year when the Harry Potter fandom has risen again, what with Cursed Child and Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them coming to theatres in a few months. This is my response:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHANO.

JK Rowling invites you to return to the wizarding world-
IT'S NOT LIKE WE LEFT IT.

So no, this book is not a return to the wizarding world, and no, the Harry Potter fandom has not "risen again" because we STILL talk about Harry Potter. We still argue about our favourite characters, we still write fanfic, we still draw fanart, we still defend our Hogwarts houses, we still complain about calmly (it's been like eleven years and we're still angry), we still pore through all the extra info on Pottermore and Twitter that JK Rowling releases. 

It's just that now we're seeing what happened after that scene on Platform 9 3/4, with Harry watching his sons leave on the train, a hand to the scar that had not pained in nineteen years, thinking that all was well.
(Apparently all is not well, since there's a story immediately after that thought.)

So now, on Harry's thirty-sixth birthday, and JK Rowling's fifty-first birthday (happy birthday, by the way), we catch the train with Albus and ride to Hogwarts for his first year and the story of the Cursed Child.

Because whether by page or by the big screen (or now the stage), Hogwarts will be there to welcome us home.

AQB: The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time

My name is Christopher John Francis Boone. I know all the countries of the world and their capital cities and every prime number up to 7,057.

When Christopher discovers his neighbour's dog dead in her yard with a gardening fork stuck through his body, he wonders what has happened. He sees it as a murder mystery- despite people telling him that most murder mysteries are about people dying. As someone who understands dogs better than people, the death of Wellington the dog is as important to him as any person's death.
He decides to investigate.

He follows the standard methods of detection, as set by his favourite detective, from the only genre of fiction he reads, Sherlock Holmes. Somewhat hindered by his difficulty in understanding human emotions and his own specific hangups, Christopher nevertheless uses his own observational skills and logic to find Wellington's killer- and in doing so, uncovers another, more personal mystery, a secret he never knew was being kept from him. (Can't tell you more without spoilers)

Mark Haddon's The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time was...interesting. The plot was fascinating and the point of view of the narrator- a boy who views the world somewhat differently from the majority of people (he has behavioural difficulties and it's implied he may have Asperger's, but this isn't confirmed or really relevant)- was intriguing. Another interesting aspect was that the chapters are numbered with successive prime numbers. However, it did sometimes drag, some exciting parts were quite blandly told (most likely because Christopher did not see it as exciting), and there were several profanities, so if you're thin-skinned to swearing, DON'T read it. If you can handle that, and you're interested in detective fiction, mathematics, dogs, or some combination of the above, then I'd recommend this book.

AQB: The Joy Luck Club

The Joy Luck Club, by Amy Tan, tells the stories of eight women, caught between the cultures of China and America: four Chinese immigrant mothers, Suyuan Woo, An-mei Hsu, Lindo Jong and Ying-ying "Betty" St. Clair; and their four American-born daughters, Jing-mei "June" Woo, Rose Hsu Jordan, Waverly Jong, and Lena St. Clair.

The Joy Luck Club is formed by Suyuan Woo as a club for playing mah jong and feasting, with three friends, also Chinese immigrants, who she met at church in San Francisco. It is started in memory of a Joy Luck Club Suyuan was in Kweilin, before a Japanese invasion during World War II forced her to flee.

The book is divided into four sections with four chapters each, broadly narrating different aspects of the lives of the eight women.
The first section, Feathers from a Thousand Li Away, focuses on the pasts of the four mothers when they lived in China. Suyuan Woo, at the beginning of the novel, has just passed away, so her story is told by her daughter Jing-mei. Each of the mothers had a difficult past, which eventually convinced them to move to America.
The second section, Twenty-Six Malignant Gates, has the four daughters tell the stories of significant moments in their childhoods, while in the third, American Translation, they talk about their current lives as adults. The final section, Queen Mother of the Western Skies, again focuses on the mothers, after the moments they described in the first section.

The Joy Luck Club is unlike any other book I've ever read before. It captured my interest with the unusual structuring (the division is, according to Wikipedia, like that of a mah jong game), the fascinating vignettes of the eight women's lives, the glimpses into a culture I know almost nothing about, and the way it portrayed the conflict the women feel between the two cultures they live with. I'd never before read a book with seven points-of-view, and seven storylines woven together, yet was so clear.

I was deeply intrigued by the stories in the books- stories of a search for twin daughters abandoned for their safety; of an unfortunate concubine of a rich man, who sacrifices her life to protect her children; of women with dysfunctional relationships with their husbands; of a teenage girl successfully scheming to get out of an arranged marriage; of a living ghost of a woman who sees things before they happen; of a talented woman holding herself back in fear and annoyance of her mother; of a directionless woman who realises her mother's dream.

I'd recommend this book to anyone interested in a conflict of cultures, multiple interwoven storylines, the surprisingly difficult pasts that haunt the present lives of eight women, or any combination of the above. It's totally worth reading.

AQB: The Great Gatsby

The Great Gatsby, by F. Scott Fitzgerald, is generally considered a literary classic. However, you may also remember it, from several years ago, when it was mentioned in the newspapers because Amitabh Bachchan had a cameo in the 2013 movie. (Although the movie starred Leonardo DiCaprio as the eponymous character, I only knew of the movie because of Big B. Leo fans, please don't get mad...)

 I was interested in The Great Gatsby because it was cited in a few sample SAT essays I read a couple of years ago. From those essays, I learned some things about the novel, and therefore when I picked it up to read it, I naturally had some... "preconceived notions".

Now, I had preconceived notions about The Hunger Games, which were dispelled the moment I realised the kids were thrown into an arena- I'd thought the Games were, like, televised gladiator-style fights, but no, it was cavepeople stuff, survive and kill. I was disturbed, yes, but I was expecting action, and that's what I got.

Where am I going with this? See, I was expecting this third-person account of the underworld of a Jazz Age New York City, and how Jay Gatsby fit into that world- so I was anticipating crime and mobster stuff, kind of a 1920s version of The Godfather. Instead I got a narrative by Gatsby's neighbour Nick Carraway about how Gatsby reconnected with Daisy (Carraway's cousin) years after they first met.

Yeah. If you're planning to read it, do not, and I repeat, DO NOT start it with the expectations I had.
Maybe I'm biased. Maybe, since I got something completely different from what I was expecting, I was disappointed. Maybe I just don't have the maturity to appreciate good literature.

Frankly, I didn't really think much of The Great Gatsby.
Set in in the fictional villages of East Egg and West Egg on Long Island, it tells the story of the mysterious Jay Gatsby, a war veteran who rose to riches in the hopes of winning the attention and, by extension, love of his ex-flame, Daisy Fay.

Nick Carraway, also a former soldier in WWI from the same division as Gatsby, moves to West Egg for his job in NYC. Invited by Daisy, his cousin, for lunch, he meets a young golfer, Jordan Baker, whom he starts dating.
Daisy is now married, to Nick's college senior Tom Buchanan, and apparently it isn't a happy marriage. Tom, in fact, has a mistress, Myrtle Wilson, and Daisy is aware of this. So when she meets Gatsby, who is obviously in love with her, again, she falls for him.

And it ends pretty quickly after that. I obviously can't tell you more without "spoiling" the plot, but let's say, with a premise like that, you'd expect an epic smackdown, or a horrifying revelation. Both happen, but nowhere near as dramatic as one would expect.

By the end of the novel, three characters are dead, and Nick quickly wraps up things and goes home, like, I am so done with this place.

To sum up my opinions of The Great Gatsby: it had far less drama than anticipated, it is not light reading, and isn't particularly absorbing.

I would recommend that anyone who reads this is a) in a philosophical state of mind, b) ready to handle the slightly confusing prose, and c) someone who harbours no delusions about the level of drama and action to be found in the novel.

AQB: The Count of Monte Cristo

The Count of Monte Cristo is the first book I've read in my reading quest (which I explained in A Quest Begins). First written as a serialized story in the Journal des Débats between 1844 and 1846, it was later compiled into a novel and is considered a literary classic that remains in print even today. I read the unabridged English translation of the original French (titled Le Comte de Monte Cristo), trying not to blitz through the 1100-odd pages in the small but fat edition I'd borrowed.

I'll try to avoid too many spoilers.

The Count of Monte Cristo, by Alexandre Dumas, follows the story of a young sailor, Edmond Dantes. At nineteen, Dantes is happy with his life. He has a caring father, he is engaged to the woman he loves, and he is about to be made captain of his benefactor's ship, the Pharaon.
But two men are jealous of him- Danglars, his shipmate who wants Dantes' imminent position on the Pharaon, and Fernand Mondego, his fiancée Mercédès' cousin, who is in love with her.

Together they plot to get Dantes out of the way. They do this by framing Dantes as a Bonapartist. The late captain of the Pharaon (a known Bonapartist) charged the innocent Dantes to do two things: one, to deliver a packet to a general on Elba with the exiled Napoleon; and two, to hand over a letter to an unknown man in Paris. Dantes has no idea of the political importance of the packet and letter, and only does it to honour the last wishes of his superior- but Danglars and Fernand imply in an anonymous letter that he is fully aware of the contents of his deliveries, and is a fervent, violent Bonapartist.

Dantes is arrested an hour before his wedding.

The deputy procureur de roi at Marseilles, M. de Villefort, realises that Dantes is innocent and plans to acquit him. Then he finds out who the letter is addressed to- M. de Noirtier, a known Bonapartist, and Villefort's father.
Villefort, a royalist, has worked hard to reach his position and still dreams of becoming the procureur de roi of France. In order to safeguard his own career, he pretends that Dantes is, in fact, a Bonapartist, takes the information that there is a Bonapartist uprising stirring to the king, and throws Dantes in the Chateau d'If, a notorious prison, without a trial.

Mere days after Dantes' incarceration, Napoleon Bonaparte returns to France and the Hundred Days begin. M. Morrel, Dantes' patron, tries to petition for his release. Villefort stalls until Napoleon is finally exiled to St. Helena and the petition never goes through. Dantes is given up for dead.

Dantes, languishing in jail, meets the Abbé Faria, a supposedly mad Italian priest who is actually a genius. Together the two plot to escape the Chateau d'If. Faria tells him the secret of a great treasure, but dies before they can escape.
Dantes makes a daring escape after Faria's death. He has been in prison for fourteen years.
He claims the treasure Faria told him about, and proceeds to reinvent himself, as the mysterious Count of Monte Cristo, and search for his enemies.
Danglars is now a respected banker, who has been granted the title of a baron. Fernand is married to Mercédès, and having risen through the ranks of the army, is now called le Comte de Morcerf. Villefort has achieved his ambition and is the procureur de roi.
With his nearly unlimited new wealth and the knowledge Faria had imparted to him, Dantes proceeds to take his revenge on the men responsible for throwing him in prison.

Edmond Dantes' transformation from a cheerful, carefree young merchant sailor, to an enigmatic, bitter man who considers himself an instrument of divine justice is impressive to read. He is a master manipulator, pulling and slicing strings no one can see until a puppet falls and one realises what it was all about. His plans are so convoluted, even Albus Dumbledore (who, let's face it, is a majorly manipulative leader whose plans are far from straightforward) would be impressed.

I'd recommend this to anyone interested in a period thriller, who doesn't mind thick books, or wading through occasionally flowery language. If you want just the story (which is pretty awesome) and would prefer to skip the hundreds of pages and the elaborate prose, I would recommend an abridged version. Either way, it's worth it!

A Quest Begins

Gilmore Girls is an old TV show I've recently discovered. Following the lives of Lorelai Gilmore, her daughter Rory, and her mother Emily, I've spent quite some time binge-watching episodes.
Rory Gilmore, the youngest "Gilmore Girl", is a bookworm. And when I say bookworm, I mean, like, full-on bookworm - she's been seen in the show reading books by a whole range of authors, from Dr Seuss to JK Rowling to PG Wodehouse to Sylvia Plath.
Which has prompted what is known as the "Rory Gilmore Reading Challenge", a list of books Rory's read in the show.

When I tried to see how many of the books on the list I had read, I got a pretty abysmal score- 20 out of 339.
I set out to try and better it.
I'm hoping, in the next twelve months, to double that score.
And as I do so, I'm planning to post my progress, reviewing the books I read as I tick them off the list.

I hope, on the way, to discover new, interesting books. And let's face it, also to impress people by saying I've read some of the more fancy, depressing-but-considered-a-classic books on that list.
I hope, as I try to double in a year the number of books on the challenge I've read in almost sixteen, that you'll see some that maybe you've never read, and decide whether you want to give it a shot too.

And so I begin, as so many of my favourite protagonists do, on a quest. Admittedly it's not as dramatic as defeating a dark lord, or wreaking revenge- but only at face value. Because I'm doing all of that and more. As I read The Lord of the Rings series, I will walk with Frodo, and cast the One Ring into the fires of Mount Doom. As I read The Count of Monte Cristo, I will suffer with Edmond Dantes, and watch coldly as the men who unfairly cast him into prison fall in the eyes of the world. As I read The Odyssey, I will search with Telemachus for his father, and fight with Odysseus as he struggles to return home to Ithaca. As I read Emma, I will matchmake and meddle alongside Emma.

I don't need a prophecy, or a gift of a powerful object, to begin.
My quest begins now.

I Can Scare You

If you're a tenth grader, I know how to scare you. It only takes one word:

BOARDS!

Okay, that was low. Sorry. You don't have to cower behind your chairs. I'll try not to terrify you any further in this post.

Since I'm writing my board exams in March, it's naturally a topic that often crops up in conversations, at school and at home. Equally naturally, I really prefer to avoid the topic unless absolutely necessary, like when a teacher is invoking the marking scheme. Which happens only about three hundred and ninety four times a day. Yay.

Quick show of hands here: how many of you are nervous?

I'm just swooning from surprise at that response.

(Those of you who've finished tenth grade, or written engineering/medicine entrance tests- don't sneer. It's not like you guys were any better when YOU wrote tenth.)

Maybe it's because of the hype. Everyone seems to be an expert on tenth grade.

Teachers: Colleges will look for your tenth grade marks, if you don't do well now, your chances of getting into a good college are low.

Parents: You need to study more, these exams are very important. Colleges and even potential employers will ask for your tenth grade marks.

Indulgent relatives: If you get these many marks, I'll buy you something.

Older friends/cousins: Oh, you're in tenth grade now? *snicker* Poor you. You're so totally going to suffer. I hope there's cake at your funeral.

Random people you literally just met: Oh, tenth grade? *clucking noises* Very important, you have to do well. Otherwise you won't get a good job, and you won't be able to buy a posh car or go on holidays.

Hey guys- especially those last two categories- YOU'RE NOT HELPING.

There are different ways kids react to all this, and unfortunately none of them are very positive.

I'm bringing back some of the kids of When Our Boggarts Are The Same As Hermione's to show what I mean.

Kid 1: Board exams soon? That's not very nice. I don't really feel like studying. All these people talking is confusing me. I'll just go do something else- oh, this looks interesting! *rewatches Ariana Grande music videos on YouTube*

Kid 2: OH MY GOODNESS board exams are soon I need to memorise all of my textbooks, okay concentrate, concentrate, a mole is a unit of counting that represents six point two three into ten to the power of twenty three particles such as atoms or molecules- wait does that include ions? And this is just part of one small chapter in the syllabus, WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?!

Kid 5: Okay, a couple of months ago, I said that exams were "confusion's masterpiece", right? I need to add on to that, the horror that neither tongue nor heart cannot conceive nor name is...*gulp*...boards.

Kid 6: Exams are okay and all, but OH MY, boards are another thing altogether! My cousins are being horrible and completely scaring me, they're apparently super tough, my parents want to send me for tuitions, I've NEVER gone for two-hour-long tuition classes in three different subjects, I'm so scared!

Kid 7: That's it. I'm done. I thought my brain exploded a couple of months ago, but I was wrong. It just kind of collapsed. Now it's been blown up with crates of TNT. Look, if I tilt my head, you can see dust- the remains of my brain- pouring out of my ear.

Results during preboards?

Kid 1 sucks. Kid 2 messes up answers they knew because they were so panicky. Kid 5 does okay but not great because of nervousness. Kid 6 doesn't know some stuff because while studying their cousins' voices were playing on a loop and they couldn't absorb the material. Kid 7 sucks.

Basically, nobody does well. And that stresses everyone out even more.

It's a vicious cycle that nobody comes out happy in- not the teachers, not the parents, and certainly not the kids themselves.

Sometimes I imagine the people on the curriculum boards clad in black robes, sitting around a conference table in a darkened room, plotting difficult exam questions and formats as the leader of the board committee sits at the head of the table, laughing manically and encouraging the others while sipping blood-red liquid from a crystal champagne glass.

Which means that I picture them as the Death Eaters and Voldemort drinking some creepy dark wizard drink (probably invented by Grindelwald) that I don't even want to know about.

Such a cheery daydream.

I'm sorry. I have no advice whatsoever because I have not "been there done that" like dealing with homesickness.

So just, I guess...good luck. We can do this.

MAY THE FORCE BE WITH US.

Looking Back

It was around this time of year that I got my first ever Harry Potter book. It took me a few years to become a fan- I don't remember the process- but I do remember reading Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone in the basement of my aunt and uncle's house, soon after receiving it as a Christmas present from another aunt.

I was a little girl. Probably too young to actually understand the darkness of the series, so I waited two years before reading Chamber of Secrets. That gave me such nightmares that I didn't read the others for yet another two years. And before I quite realised it, I was a fan.

I quote characters of the Potterverse. I cry over deaths, again and again. I use instances from the series in essays and in real life. I bonded over HP with so many people, and in doing so, I made some very good friends.

I suppose that journey started, eight years ago, with that Christmas present. I had no idea that it was a phenomenon that one day would sweep me up as well. I had no idea this was the beginning of a journey that would make me laugh and cry and vent and rejoice.
Because for me, and for so many others, as I now know, the story lives on. Hogwarts will always be there to welcome us home.

That was eight years ago. The year was 2007, the same year that Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows released.

I open at the close.

Problems of a Bookworm-2

Okay, since posting Problems of a Bookworm, I've thought of a couple of others that I HAD to share.

4: The Nonexistent Summary

You know those times when you go into a bookstore and you see this book with an intriguing title and a cool cover, and you turn it over to read the blurb and...
NOTHING. The only thing at the back is:

"Breathtaking" -The Times

"Stunning" -The Guardian

Hey, publishing company? You wanna sell the book? Yeah? Cool, then. Let me know WHAT IT'S ABOUT!
So maybe it's a fantastic book about something I like, with a fascinating storyline, but how am I going to know that if all the information you provide is that some random reviewer said it was "stunning"? What if that person's idea of stunning involves teenagers living in a futuristic dystopian world who against all odds end up leading a revolution to overthrow the evil dictator who oppresses the society with irrational rules? (Because, you know, that's so original) What if that person just randomly selected a word out of the dictionary because they couldn't be bothered to read it properly? What if it really is stunning but I since I can't tell what the premise is, I don't buy it?
These issues have GOT to be addressed!

5: "It's just a book"

This is one of the greatest, most painful things you go through as a bookworm.

Sometimes, you'll be sitting somewhere, reading a book, and, well, reacting to it (laughing, crying) and someone comes up to you and asks, "Why are you laughing/crying?"
So you say, "Well, because of this book." (You might explain what's going on, too)
And they give you this pathetic look and say, "It's just a book."

Excuse me?

"It's just a book"?

You feel ready to sock them like Hermione Granger did to Draco Malfoy.

Ah, that was a satisfying moment

How can they NOT be able to understand? Do they have a heart? Any feelings?

Well, IT'S A BOOK. That's the point!

That person sees an inanimate object, with just words and pictures.
But you, you see characters, living and breathing, settings you can vividly imagine, a plot that makes you feel as if you are in it too. You feel for the heroes as if they were your friends, you hate the despicable people as if they were those bullies you face in school, you laugh at the funny parts, you cry at the sad parts.
Yes, it's "just a book". It's "just" an inanimate object that makes people laugh and cry. But if you see that as pathetic, you're missing the point. Because the fact that it can evoke emotions is not pathetic. Far from it. It's sort of magical.

Harbouring Homesickness

Homesickness sucks. It's a simple fact.
The thing is, you're aware, ahead of time, in some detached way, that you're going to be homesick, but you resolve you'll do everything to avoid it, blah, blah, blah. Ha. Well, what you will eventually find out is:

The brain may devise laws for the blood, but a hot temper leaps o'er a cold decree.

Portia said that in Merchant of Venice (I'm studying it in school, it's kind of on my mind) and though in general I do not like the basic point of the play or the thinly veiled messages (it's so racist) I do appreciate some things that are said (and the technicality at the climax, wow) , and this is one of them.

The fact is, it's absolutely true when applied to homesickness. You firmly decide that you can handle the homesickness, but when it hits- it's a tsunami of emotions. You randomly burst into tears, you're moody, you're headachy, you're lethargic, you get nightmares, all sorts of crazy things happen.

And just when that unexpectedly deep wound is starting to heal, something- news from the old place, an old photo, anything- suddenly rips off the scab and the blood starts flowing again.

Oh wow. I've clearly been reading The Book Thief too obsessively, and now my imagery, aspiring to be like those fantastically vivid descriptions (it's incredible, seriously) that elegantly call ashes "burning snowflakes", is totally lapsing and comparing, rather tritely, emotional pain to physical pain.

Recently, I experienced a particularly violent attack of homesickness on a scale that was completely unanticipated. The detached part of my brain was like, Okay, yeah, I'll miss everyone, but I can deal with that! and then a bit later, the rest of me wakes up and starts going, NOOOOOO! I CAN'T DO THIS!, drowning out the detachedly logical part, which finally just gives up and watches the whole drama, wondering how many stars it would get on IMDB if it was condensed into a movie.

Stupid cynical logical part of my brain. Here I am howling over those earrings one of my best friends gave me, breaking down while trying to practice music, tossing and turning with nightmares I can't remember when I wake up, and you're contemplating a possible screenplay to turn this whole horrible experience into a movie?!
Granted, you might get a Filmfare for that- if they have a category for "Best Movie Showcasing Overemotional Stuff Based On A Teenager's Real-Life Experience".

When I was in the grip of the height of that terrible homesickness, I watched Pixar's recent movie, Inside Out. And I cried. Some people would've been impressed by the lessons, or Riley's very imaginatively depicted mind. I know there are rave reviews and all online. But I cried because I could completely, totally relate to how Riley was struggling with homesickness- although I wouldn't have attempted to run away- and it felt so good to know that what I'm going through happens and it's okay. Kind of like that time when you suddenly started getting acne as an adolescent and you were like, What is happening to my face? Am I going to grow tentacles? AM I AN ALIEN?! until people told you it's normal and no aspersions will be cast on your nativity to this planet, which is relieving until you remember that Yoda, Superman and Megamind are aliens, so maybe aliens aren't so bad.

Look, if you're homesick right now, I'm not saying, "Oh, it'll be fine, you'll get over it eventually."
I've been there, I've had people say that to me, and it doesn't help. It doesn't help to be told that you'll get over it, because- well, because it just doesn't. Maybe it's because we're steeped in self-pity and are kind of cool with wallowing in it for a while. Maybe it's because we feel guilty, as if we're betraying old friends and the old place by getting over homesickness. I don't know, I'm no Freud. All I know is that it sucks and you should try not to feel guilty for feeling homesick. Because when the homesickness is prolonged, like more than a couple of months, that's how you start feeling- guilty for not being able to settle in, and that is almost as bad as the homesickness itself. You have every right to be homesick. You have no right to be guilty about it.

I wrote this because I would've loved to read something like this a while ago, when I was going through it.
Try to see at least a few positives. Like a great view from the window. An interesting competition you can join. A good teacher.
Try to not go all Nico di Angelo- do not bottle everything up, because it will not come in handy while summoning the dead, unless you're a child of Hades. There will be at least one understanding person you can talk to, whether in your own family or someone new you just met.
Try not to give off an aura of aloofness.
Try to get some peace of mind that doesn't involve you joining a clique of kids who've just moved that functions on complaining about the lousiness of this new place (it will become incredibly boring if you have only that one, rather depressing, topic).

So remember that there are lots of people out there who understand what you're going through, who could tag you on FB about it with the caption #beentheredonethat #isupportyou #youcandothis, all sorts of cheery hashtags, but probably won't because they understand that you don't want your FB friends to know how you're feeling unless it's you telling the world in a carefully crafted status update complete with a sad-face selfie.

I would put a whole bunch of hashtags to end this post, but I'm not good at that, so I will leave it to the experts (plus it's a little bit clichéd).
So, to conclude- you're not alone. Everyone else in the world who's been homesick (and is not in denial about it) is wishing you luck.

When Our Boggarts Are The Same As Hermione's

How many of you have woken up at 3 AM and sat bolt upright in bed, your heart racing, right after a dream about failing an exam?
How many of you will say, about two weeks before exams, that your Boggart will be the same as Hermione's, a teacher informing you that you have failed all your exams?

The thing is, almost everyone, at some point, has totally freaked about exams.

And obviously they have a right to. I mean, it takes a pretty thick-skinned kid not to freak what with adults all around them intoning in voices of doom about the importance of exams.
It goes something like this:

Adults: The Day of Reckoning draws near. Prepare, for your souls will be weighed upon the scales, and all the 85+ scoring kids will be rewarded with higher expectations and others will be doomed to extended hours of study and no TV.

Kids: This is it, the apocalypse...whoa-o, I'm wakin' up, I FEEL IT IN MY BONES, enough to make my SYSTEMS BLOW!



Well, at least we're not trapped in an underground prison as
stuffed animals fight to the death above our heads...

We need more pyschologists researching the effects of exams on students, because it's kind of scary. We all react in such different ways...

Kid 1: The wall is so nice. So...plain. The evenness of the colour...and then that little crack at the top that emphasises it.

Kid 2: Ohmigodohmigodohmigod what's that formula about acceleration there's like v minus u by t and then there's one more, two a into s equals to something, what does s stand for, GAAAAH I'm freaking out here.

Kid 3: A single drop can disturb the surface of a lake. We must stay calm. What is the purpose of exams in our lives?

Kid 4: I will pass this exam, I will pass this exam, I will pass this exam. Power of positive thinking. I will pass this exam, I will pass this exam...

Kid 5: Is the angle of incidence measured from the normal or the surface of the material? Because it makes a difference, how am I going to calculate sin i by sin r otherwise to find the refractive index.

Kid 6: Are you sure sin i by sin r is refractive index? I thought that was speed of light in vacuum by speed of light in medium.

Kid 7: BOOM!

(Everyone turns to look)

Kid 2: Do you mind? Some of us are trying to study here.

Kid 7: Sorry. My brain just exploded.

Kid 5: Oh horror, horror, horror! Tongue nor heart cannot conceive nor name thee! Confusion now hath made his masterpiece!

Kid 6: What's that?

Kid 1: There's just the one crack. What are you talking about?

Kid 6: No, not you. What is confusion's masterpiece?

Kid 4: That's some Shakespeare thing. Macbeth, I think.

Kid 5: Confusion now hath made his masterpiece...EXAMS!

Forget Duncan's murder. Confusion's masterpiece is exams.

Shakespeare, you wasted such an awesome dialogue (Tongue nor heart cannot conceive nor name thee, how cool is that?) on some king's death?

See, this is one of the main problems with Shakespeare. He came up with such cool phrasing and then used them for things kids can't relate to.

Of course, it's highly possible kids weren't exactly his target audience.

Sad, he didn't recognise the huge potential of such a market.

Notice how I digress? That's another symptom of the phenomenon we were just discussing...

Yep. I have exams.

Dear Jo

Last year, I posted an emotional tribute to Harry Potter on his birthday. This year, I'm paying tribute to his creator.

Dear Jo,
How do I start? In a way, it was easier to write to Harry- the name synonymous with yours- last year, on the birthday you share.

He's thirty-five now. The world's only known him for eighteen years. But you were the one who created him, him and his friends and his world. You created, twenty-five years ago, Harry Potter and Hogwarts. And when you showed your creation to the world- we loved it.

We followed Harry's story. We felt as if we were part of his world. We watched as he saved the Philosopher's Stone, as he fought the basilisk, as he resisted Dementors. We were there as he fought through the Triwizard Tournament and witnessed Voldemort's return, as he started Dumbledore's Army and broke into the Department of Mysteries with his amazing friends. We looked on as he tried to find the Half-Blood Prince, as he searched for Horcruxes, as he finally sacrificed himself.

We cheered as he played Quidditch. We laughed at his sarcastic comments and all the fun times. We growled at Malfoy. We cried with him as Cedric, then Sirius, and Dumbledore died. We wept when Hedwig, Mad-Eye, Dobby, Fred, Remus, Tonks, Snape, and dozens of others perished. We rooted for him as he battled through all the obstacles you put in his path and emerged, battered emotionally and physically, but triumphant.

We have a lot to thank you for. We're not a kingdom, you see. We're a fandom. And you're the queen.
Happy 50th birthday, Jo. You're amazing.
-Purple Dragonfly

Amazing What They Do With Corrugated Cardboard

Who is your favourite pair of characters?

Tweedledum and Tweedledee from Through the Looking Glass? Fred and George from Harry Potter? Asterix and Obelix? Laurel and Hardy? Hiccup and Toothless from How To Train Your Dragon? Kristoff and Sven from Frozen? John and Phillipa from Children of the Lamp? Hallie and Annie from Parent Trap? Jo and Laurie from Little Women?

I love all these guys. But my favourite?
Guess.

Keep guessing.
Want a clue?

One's an animal. One's a human.
No. Not Mowgli and Baloo from The Jungle Book (ooh, love those guys too).
Still didn't get it?
Okay, maybe THIS will help.


CALVIN AND HOBBES!!!!

I have been reading Calvin and Hobbes for so long I can't even remember when I started.

Calvin and Hobbes say and do such awesome things. I mean, look at this one.

Brilliance. I wish I had the guts to write that on a test.

During those just-before-lunch classes, when physics equations are deep-frying my brain like a mirchi bajji, and my stomach is playing a Sivamani and Zakir Hussain jugalbandi, and visions of my favourite foods float in front of my eyes, I can totally relate to this strip:

Ha. Calvin, you're only six. Wait till you get to my age. Then you'll see. And, judging by darkly uttered accounts from trusted sources, it only gets worse. *sigh*

Calvin and Hobbes are funny for various reasons.
Calvin thinks he's above everyone else, an unrecognized genius, and so a lot of the justification he gives for his stupid actions is based on that, which is absolutely ridiculous and very funny. Take a look at this one.

Yeah, why can't the world change to suit us?

And then of course there's his astonishingly advanced vocabulary.

I don't know what that title even means

Honestly speaking, my consistently good grades in the vocab section of my writing tasks is largely due to my love of Calvin and Hobbes.

The way Calvin and Hobbes look at the world is kind of...different from the way most people do. Which is a bit of an understatement.
One thing I want to do, with someone who won't get bored by it, is play CALVINBALL. The coolest, most mysterious sport in the world. Most mysterious, that is because only Calvin and Hobbes know how to play it. Heck, even Bill Watterson doesn't know the rules.
Playing Calvinball is probably one of the most realistic things on my list of "Things I Want To Do Because Fictional Characters Have Done It".



Calvinball, in my opinion, is truly intriguing. What's a bonus box? Where's the Song Zone? What sort of a scoring system involves Qs with numbers? Why yell Olly-wolly polliwoggy ump-bump fizz?
Of course, since "you can't play it the same way twice", we can make up whatever we want and play it. This. Totally. Rocks.

Okay, I can fangirl for ages over Calvinball, but let me move on...
Who are the inhabitants of the strip's world?
Other than Calvin and Hobbes, there are only four people I consider important to the strip...
Calvin's parents...

Must be hard, raising a kid like Calvin...

Calvin drives them totally crazy...as is evident, just by reading this one strip.

Now meet Susie, Calvin's neighbour and classmate.

And quite often, she gets the better of him, making him pretty mad.

The fourth person is Calvin's babysitter Rosalyn, whom he hates and fears:


And for good reason...


Because she's the only one who can scare Calvin and actually make him listen. Look at how she threatens him! Reading a strip involving a Calvin-versus-Rosalyn fight gives me about as much pleasure as watching the Avengers beating up Loki in 3D.

I can actually become lyrical about Calvin and Hobbes, which is boring and weird to people who are not such ardent fans. So, let me end with a few of my favourite C&H strips:







   
And to close, a strip that sums up the spirit of Calvin and Hobbes...


There's treasure everywhere.

10 Ways You Know You're A Bookworm

When I checked into Goodreads, I saw a link that said, "Sound Familiar, Bookworms?", followed by the caption "21 Ways You Know You're a Goodreads Member."
The link turned out to be a member-generated Goodreads post listing 21 things a Goodreads member does.

I thought, "Huh, okay. Why not?"
Then I remembered assorted posts I saw on Pinterest: "You Know You're A Harry Potter Fan When..." "You Know You're a Hunger Games Fan When..." and stuff like that.
And then I thought, "Why not make my own?"
Therefore this post.

 You know you're a bookworm when...

1)...you can quote verbatim entire passages from your favourite books

2)...when you meet someone new, and during your first conversation, they mention that they like one of your favourite books, you feel you've met a kindred soul (and if they say they hate it, you think, "I now have no interest in furthering this acquaintanceship")

3)...you can argue for hours about a book or a character ("I feel sorry for Draco Malfoy. I like him." "He's such a bully! Remember 'Weasley is our King'? That's so spiteful!" "He's insecure." "Right, which is why he struts around, all like, 'MY FATHER WILL HEAR ABOUT THIS'.")

4)...you randomly make references in your conversations

5)...you light up like a row of diyas on Diwali when someone understands and appreciates a fictional reference you've made ("YESSSSSS! You understand me!"or, as Tony Stark would say:
)

6)...your to-do-someday list includes drinking blue Coke, or having Butterbeer, or something that only people in books do ("Can we buy blue food colouring? I want to put some in a glass of Coke.")

7)...your family or friends have to yell in your ear or snatch away your book if they're trying to get your attention while you're reading

8)...you don't notice hunger or thirst or time when you're reading ("You haven't eaten for seven hours." "Hmm? Oh, no, I'm not hungry. Look, I'm in the middle of a battle scene, so...")

9)...when your parents or some other adult ask you to sort out books, you eagerly agree and once you start, refuse to take a break until you're done (unless you discover a much-loved book you haven't read in ages and decide to reread it, right there in the middle of the floor)

10)...when you finish a really good book, you talk so much about it, your family seriously considers locking you up and throwing away the key

Aaaaaaaaaand